Double Click Dailies
The Journals and Reviews of Marz and Peach Zeenie

Thursday, May 16, 2002

Local War Zone

On Wednesday morning my semi-monthly cleaning lady called me to let me know that she would not be coming that day. "I have to go to a Funeral", she said sadly. When I asked her who it was, she told me that it was the son of a neighbor friend of hers who was killed in a drive-by shooting. The son lived in Pacoima where there is a lot of gang related crimes. The day before I was on my way to an appointment in South Central L. A. The appointment was with a teacher who worked for L.A. Unified School District. She told me that instead of taking the Vernon St. exit off the Harbor Freeway, that it would be faster to get off at the 51st exit of which I was less familiar. And although I had been in this part of town before, 51st St. just wasn't a main throughfare that I knew.

I drove a few blocks and suddenly came upon a police crime scene yellow tape stretched acrosss the street. Up ahead at the intersection were several L.A.P.D. cars. Overhead a couple of helicopters flew close over the intersection and surrounding streets in ever increasing wider circles.
Needless to say I couldn't go any furthur. I pulled into a driveway and got out of the car to see what was happening. I asked a woman who was standing off to the side of the driveway at the entrance to a small Park. "Someone's been shot," she said very sternly, glancing at me swiftly and turning way. I got back into my car and made a u-turn behind the other cars that had come on the scene as I had, and were now trying to get out of the dead-end trafffic jam. I made many turns in and out of different streets before I finally made it to my destination. I was surprised that I didn't feel nervous or the slightest bit concerned. Maybe because it had happened to me before. It felt somewhat strange however, as I could still hear the droning of the helicopters over my head all the way to the school.

I am sitting here wondering about all the drive-bys and the Gangs connected with them. How do you make joining a gang repugnant to a young person who wants desperately to belong and to be cool? There have been many ad campaigns in the media and even in local schools about the use of tobacco and the negative aspects of smoking. There were ads that were released many years ago with Brooke Shields as a spokesperson for anti-smoking campaign slogans and ad posters that were distributed in the schools and shown on t.v. There has also been an ongoing anti-drug program called DARE that is circulating in many school districts with the local police 'teaching' classes to children as young as elementary school age. I also hapened to see an ad(not sure who sponsored it) in YM Magazine for young adults concerning a girl who was grounded for smoking weed. It showed the teenager sulking at home by herself while four of her friends were out enjoying themselves at the local hang-out. The message was obvious and very simple. It occurred to me that while much has been done to reach out to the Y generation, that it seems nothing has been thought of to deter kids from joining gangs and the ultimate event that occurs because of it: premature death by guns.

If there is some sort of program or campaign, I am unaware of it. Maybe there is someone out there with a similar idea who has already started something or has even organized a group. I just haven't seen anything being done on a wide scale. And it's really bad. This has been going on for as long as I can remember. Maybe it's easier said than done. It is just so darn disheartening and so terribly sad. It is scary to think that as much of gang related shootings occur, that it has become the 'norm' and that the newspapers just can't report all of them. Something that happens every day in our community and becomes so routine that we have all become oblivious to it's trajedies.



posted by Peach | Thursday, May 16, 2002

Wednesday, May 08, 2002

The Woman in the Elevator

Two women get on an elevator. A man gets on seconds later. One of the women I'll call the 'Bitch'. The other woman we'll simply refer to as the 'non-bitch'. It is known by all who work in this particular Department that the elevator in this building has a mind of it's own. No matter who gets on first or what button is pushed it will always go 'down' to the Basement level. When the man enters the elevator Non-Bitch says that she thinks "the elevator is going up". At this point the man either presses the button for the basement or he says "'no" and presses the button. The story is sort of murky here and I believe he just turned and pressed the button for going down. As the elevator is going down to the Lower Level the Bitch makes comments pertaining to the integrity of the man and although I do not know what words were used it was basically to say that he was a jerk. (She may have even whispered loud on purpose to Non-Bitch so he would be sure to hear her.) This was a while ago. Yesterday this man was invited to a Department Luncheon where the Bitch was a Supervisor and of course she showed up. She snubbed him at the luncheon and has been doing so ever since the Elevator incident.

The story was related to me by the man. He told me of the kind of behavior she has displayed over the past 2 or 3 years or however long ago this happened. And that her attitude towards him is one of indifference and coldness. Not that he really wanted to have anything to do with her anyway. Upon hearing the story I expressed my understanding of what a 'bitch' she was as he called her and what I thought of the elevator occurrance. I said that I thought that her behavior was not acceptable. But I also told him that I thought that when Non-Bitch said that she thought the elevator was going up, that she meant they were planning on going up. I said he probably should have waited for them to go up before he pressed the button to go down(knowing of course that the elevator's dysfunction would bring it down anyway if he pressed the Basement button) I thought this was the right thing to do. It would have been the polite gesture to make in regards to the facts that were relayed to me. I was not expecting his outraged response at all. He was very angry with me, and said I did not support him or even care. I sort of took this in, thought about what he had said and then tried to convince him again why I thought the women should have gone up first before he went down.............. I am not sure why this conversation got out of control but it did. I have not spoken with him since yesterday. He is still very angry with me and I am even afraid to e-mail him. I am very hurt and feel betrayed. I cried last night and again this morning. Yesterday a kind of numbness took over in which I was silent. Then I went through an anger stage in which I wanted to scream. I also wrote a 'poor me' letter that I was hoping would be found 'accidentally'. How could this have happened? Is there something I'm missing here? Is it necessary to climb inside his psyche to see where he is coming from? Is this just about having a 'bad day at the office'?

I may not be sure where he is coming from but I certainly know of what my position is. Although many people complain about the lack of this, I do find that men still will open doors for a woman . And if two people come to a door or entrance at the same time, there are those, (men and women too), who will step aside and allow the other person to go through first. It is a nice gesture; and I cannot understand why, in this busy world, people cannot perform a chivalrous act and think about someone else for a small millisecond in time besides themselves. My attitude about the 'elevator' is very simple. I still believe what I told him. But my thinking of what elevator etiquette really is should not be interpreted in a way that my disagreement means that I am not supportive of him and who he is, and that I really do care very much how he feels. My intention was not to insult him or otherwise try to demean him; just that I'm entitled to my opinion . I only know that my sensitive heart is hurting and that I do not know the way back. And that the discussion over who has the right of way in an elevator should not be the cause, today, of a man's anger and a woman's painful hanging out to dry and of love's precious lost moments.


posted by Peach | Wednesday, May 08, 2002

Thursday, May 02, 2002

Are You There?

"Wow, Double Click, are you still out there ?" " Hey, Peach are you gonna update this thing before 2003?" Yup I'm back. Yes I'm 'gonna update this thing before 2003.'

I'm not sure I understand how people get bored, or that they have 'time on their hands'. I have too much to do , too much to think about and too much 'stuff' that needs to get taken care of. I just saw a movie last week-end called "Changing Lanes." Samuel Jackson is, among other things, a participant in a Twelve Step Program (Alcoholics Anonymous). His Facilitator(WillliamHurt ) tells him at one point that his problem is not drinking. He says his drug of choice is chaos. He basically tells Jackson that he lives on drama and thrives on chaos. And in a gesture that defines both a frustrated friend and helper, and a kick in the but to get his act together, Hurt turns around and storms off.

I'm not sure if chaos is my drug of choice. But I am beginning to believe that my drug might be "staying busy", which actually does make my life a kind of chaos. I never seem to get anything done. My father was just in a car accident and , although he is o.k., I am trying to see if I can be of any help as the idiot who rear-ended him at 60 miles an hour claims it's my Dad's fault.......I am working on three, no, make that four projects simultaneously..... I am taking care of a sick Kitty..( as I am sitting here my business phone is ringing at 8:30 at night!) AND...and I would like to 'blog' once in a while. Actually I had planned on staying on top of this weblog at least every other day. ......I went on a business appointment yesterday . I sat down at this guy's desk across from him and listened to his spiel. At his back were these very open, clear glass Church type windows going up about six feet at the corner of his 'corner ' office. He had a great view of all the corners at the street intersection. All of a sudden a lonely ladder with no apparent human attached falls gently against the windows. In a few seconds a man in uniform climbs up the rungs and begins to wash the windows. My Business colleague turned for a second to look at the window washer. "Can't look" he said "I'm afraid of heights," and then turned towards me to continue his discussion. I was, of course, facing the window all the time. It was somehow funny that two very upstanding business suit kind of people were carrying on a serious conversation while a very intent window washer was doing his thing less than two feet away as though we weren't even there. I mean this guy was really into it and concentrating directly on those picture windows even though he was practically on top of us. Kind of intimate. And if the windows had been open, he could have heard every word , even if we had been whispering.............very bizarre, at least from my vantage point.

Luigi just came in to show me a small saucepan he had taken from the refrigerator. "What is this puke?" he says pointing to my half eaten oatmeal from yesterday's breakfast. He needed the pan to cook something . "I guess you can throw it out", I said. But as he went back to the kitchen I called after him to explain to him that I really like oatmeal and it made my nipples hard. ( I don't think he heard me. ) Results not guaranteed. Neither are the absurdist comments made on this program. Hey, don't go suing this website if it doesn't work for you.

See Ya, (before 2003)

posted by Peach | Thursday, May 02, 2002
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